Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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