So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
