There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
