drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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