At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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