I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
tell me about the eggs
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize