I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
The adults are the big ones right?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
