I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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