Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize