A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize