Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize
