There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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