Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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