i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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