We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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