i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Woke up backwards on a recliner
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
