I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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