we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
