exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
