Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize
