I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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