before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize