Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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