I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
just found out that she named her cat after me.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
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