dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize