i would punch a child for taco bell
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
