I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
