i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You can't special order awesome
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize