It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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