So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
