"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
