im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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