It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
