if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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