you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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