I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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