Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
