sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
