Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
