He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
