I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
