'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
