Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize