what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
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