it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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