Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
