the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
