why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
