man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
