she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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